And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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