so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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