She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
