I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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