do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
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I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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