I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
