So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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