What did we do last night that was yellow?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize