dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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