yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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