Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
