Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
