I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize
