break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
