She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
