Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
The ass gains better be worth it
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
