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• (313): View more from Michigan

  My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (970): View more from Colorado

  I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Strong work

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  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.

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• (925): View more from California

  I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.

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