Texts From Last Night

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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I had another sleeping on concrete incident.

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  (609): I had another sleeping on concrete incident. http://tfl.nu/nctv
  Replies (10) Good night (3034) Bad night (1306)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I am full of burrito and curiosity

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  (602): I am full of burrito and curiosity http://tfl.nu/k856
  Replies (24) Good night (5375) Bad night (714)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.

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  (602): You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary. http://tfl.nu/hnqx
  Replies (24) Good night (5429) Bad night (1070)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure

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  (214): Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure http://tfl.nu/kj79
  Replies (7) Good night (3407) Bad night (1032)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.

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  (309): I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard. http://tfl.nu/r907
  Replies (4) Good night (2877) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.

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  (904): After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay. http://tfl.nu/z22k
  Replies (4) Good night (2354) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.

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  (360): There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe. http://tfl.nu/9hec
  Replies (5) Good night (952) Bad night (1270)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.

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  (859): We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information. http://tfl.nu/bnu1
  Replies (1) Good night (1098) Bad night (798)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.

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  (219): I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell. http://tfl.nu/9drc
  Replies (19) Good night (1859) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..

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  (216): Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started.. http://tfl.nu/1p0k
  Replies (9) Good night (1313) Bad night (488)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.

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  (412): I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause. http://tfl.nu/76t1
  Replies (3) Good night (1343) Bad night (444)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.

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  (215): no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus. http://tfl.nu/psky
  Replies (7) Good night (904) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on

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  (609): Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on http://tfl.nu/f543
  Replies (2) Good night (825) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.

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  (440): The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch. http://tfl.nu/uy0f
  Replies (2) Good night (802) Bad night (228)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  If you need anything just hit me up

  (845): View more from New York

  Pancakes

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Noted.

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  (201): If you need anything just hit me up (845): Pancakes (201): Noted. http://tfl.nu/a0ik
  Replies (1) Good night (783) Bad night (240)

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