I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize