The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
