Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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