I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
