you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize