This is not my ceiling
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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