Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize