My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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