plz talk dirty to me
wat bout pragnant strippers??
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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