Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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