I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Randomize
