...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
