She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
