The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
