I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize
