Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize