I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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