If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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