i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize