Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize