Swine flu. Run for my life!
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
