1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
