Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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