I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
