Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
