oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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