dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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