i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize