wake up i wanna do it froggy style
there was a trapeze. enough said
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Dick very happy bro
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
