so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
