i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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