What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
