can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
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No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
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all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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